Match Made In Hell

One of the authors whose books I love will post a picture on her fan page and challenge her readers to write a short fiction snippet from time to time. 

This was the picture she posted, taken from here

Here\’s my snippet.
“Behold the unicorns.” He swept his arm out in a grand gesture, beaming with a smug satisfaction on his face.
The girls screamed and burst out of the door, making a dash for their birthday presents. 
I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. 
“You do not seem pleased with the gifts,” he said with a slight frown. “I made the effort to ask them what they wanted, and I gave them exactly what they asked for. Sophie’s breathes ice, Ginny’s runs as fast as lightning, Ely’s emits fire and Trina’s can scare the living shit out of anyone who pisses her off.”
Trina’s can what? What the hell had they been talking about?
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate your effort, but the girls have been ostracized and bullied enough. This is not going to make them any more popular in school. How am I going to have a birthday party with these… creatures prancing around?”
His lips curled into a sneer. “After this party, they will learn to respect our daughters.” 
My eyes narrowed. “Excuse me. ‘Ours’”?
“Ours,” his eyes darkened as his gaze bore into me.
I folded my arms. “That’s quite presumptuous.”
“There is nothing presumptuous about this. You are an undertaker. I am a grim reaper. We are a match made in hell. You are just delaying the inevitable,” he declared, with an air of finality. He turned with a violent swish of his cloak and strode towards the ecstatic girls. 
I sighed and made a beeline for the fridge. Since it’s too early for vodka, I shall settle for a beer instead.

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